Beyond the Hierarchy
Beyond Beautiful: Disability, Liberation, Love
Season 3, Episode 7 - Beyond the Hierarchy
🧭 Episode Summary
In this personal solo episode, Mandi explores the hierarchy of disability, the ways ableism operates as a system, and how internalized and lateral ableism can shape our relationships with ourselves and other disabled people.
Drawing from her own experiences growing up as a physically disabled person, Mandi reflects on the pressure to distinguish herself from people with intellectual, developmental, and cognitive disabilities and the harmful messages she absorbed about whose disabilities were considered more acceptable, valuable, or worthy of respect.
Through the lens of disability justice, she examines how ableism encourages disabled people to compete for dignity rather than challenge the systems that marginalize all of us. She also shares how her understanding of disability, community, and liberation transformed as she
moved from separation toward solidarity.
This episode is an invitation to engage in honest self-reflection, embrace accountability without shame, and imagine a future where every disabled person belongs.
💬 Key Themes
Ableism as a System
Internalized Ableism
Lateral Ableism
The Hierarchy of Disability
Respectability Politics
🚨Partnership
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📜 Full Transcript
Mandi: Welcome to Beyond Disability Liberation Love. I'm Mandi, your Queer Christian Disabled host.
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Mandi: Today's episode is a little different. It's still very personal to me and requires a lot of vulnerability. And honestly, it's an episode that requires me to tell on myself a little bit. We're going to talk about the hierarchy of disability, Internalized ableism, lateral ableism, and the ways that ableism can show up not only between disabled and non disabled people, but but within our own community and within ourselves. This isn't an episode about pointing fingers, it's an episode about growth. Because if disability justice has taught me anything, it's that accountability isn't about shame, it's about recognizing where we've caused harm, understanding how we got there, and choosing a different path forward. And that's exactly what this episode is about. Before I share my own experiences, I want to define a few terms that will come up throughout this conversation. When many people hear the word ableism, they think about discrimination against disabled people. And while that is certainly part of it, disability justice asks us to think bigger. Ableism is a system. It is a system of beliefs, values, policies, practices, and cultural norms that prioritize certain bodies and minds over others. It's the idea that there is a right way to move, a right way to learn, communicate, think, behave, work, and contribute, and that people who don't fit those expectations are somehow less valuable.
Mandi: Ableism shows up everywhere. It shows up in our education systems that aren't designed for all learners, just like we learned last week. It shows up in workplaces that value productivity over humanity. Just like we discussed in the episode Beyond Employment, it shows up in healthcare systems that often view disability as something to be fixed rather than accommodated. And we see this in the medical model of disability, which we'll definitely talk about in future episodes. Ableism also shows up in government policies, media representation, faith communities, and everyday interactions. Ableism is a system and all of us are exposed to its messages. And that brings us to internalized ableism. Internalized Ableism happens when disabled people begin to absorb and believe society's harmful messages about disability. It can look like shame. It can look like hiding our needs or masking. It can look like pushing ourselves beyond our limits to prove our worth. It can look like believing that our value depends on how closely we can resemble non disabled people. And then there's lateral ableism. Lateral ableism Is ableism directed toward other disabled people? It's when disabled people absorb ableist beliefs and then direct them sideways within the community. It can look like judging someone's support needs or distancing ourselves from people with certain disabilities. It can look like believing that some disabilities are more acceptable, more respectable, or more valuable than others. And if I'm honest, I spent years participating in exactly that. Growing up as a physically disabled person. I desperately wanted people to know that I was different. I wanted them to know that I was smart. I wanted them to know I could succeed, that I could speak for myself. I wanted them to know that I was capable. At the time, I thought I was advocating for myself, and in some ways I was. But looking back, I can see something else underneath those efforts. I wasn't just trying to convince people of my worth. I was trying to distance myself from other disabled people, especially people with intellectual, developmental, and cognitive disabilities.
Mandi: There was a part of me that wanted people to look at me and think, she's not that kind of disabled. Even saying that now makes me uncomfortable. But I think it's important to tell the truth, because I know I wasn't alone. Many of us were taught, directly or indirectly, that some disabilities were more acceptable than others, that some disabled people were more deserving of respect than others, that some disabilities were tragic and others were inspirational. That some people should be listened to while others should be spoken for.
I absorbed those messages, and for a long time, I didn't question them.
What I was really doing was was trying to climb a hierarchy that should never have existed in the first place. I was trying to secure my place by creating distance between myself and other disabled people. But here's what I've learned. The hierarchy is a lie.
It's a lie created by ableism because ableism benefits when disabled people compete for dignity. Ableism benefits when we divide ourselves into categories of worthy and unworthy. It's a system that benefits when we spend our energy distinguishing ourselves from one another instead of challenging the system itself. The truth is that respectability has never protected us. You can be educated, articulate, successful, independent, productive, and still experience ableism. The same systems that devalue People with intellectual and developmental disabilities are connected to the systems that devalue all disabled people. The hierarchy doesn't actually keep anyone safe. It just teaches us to abandon one another. And that's where disability justice changed everything for me. The more I invested in disability justice, the more my worldview expanded. Disability justice challenged me to ask difficult questions. Who gets centered in disability conversations? Who gets left out? Whose voices are considered credible? Whose experiences are overlooked? What assumptions am I carrying? And perhaps the hardest question of what parts of ableism have I accepted as truth? The answers weren't always comfortable, but they were necessary. Because the deeper I went into disability justice, the more I fell in love with the disability community. Not just the parts that looked like me, not just the people whose experiences I immediately understood the entire community. I began to see the brilliance, creativity, resilience, wisdom, and humanity that exists across every disability experience. I started to understand that liberation isn't something we earn. It's something we all deserve. And if justice is only available to some disabled people, then it isn't justice at all. If accessibility only works for some disabled people, then it isn't accessibility. If dignity is reserved for people who meet society's standards, then it isn't dignity. Justice and liberation have to include all of us. People with physical disabilities, intellectual disabilities, developmental disabilities, cognitive disabilities, psychiatric disabilities, chronic illnesses, people with high support needs and low support needs, People who communicate differently and who learn differently. All of us. Our liberation is connected. I don't want to be part of the problem. I don't want to reinforce the systems that have harmed our community. I want to build something different. A world where disabled people don't have to compete for humanity. A world where we don't have to prove our worth. A world where we recognize that every disabled person belongs. The more I embrace that vision, the more I learn to love myself. When I stopped distancing myself from other disabled people, I stopped distancing myself from. From parts of my own identity. Disability justice didn't just transform how I saw the community. It transformed how I saw myself.
Mandi: While this episode is shorter than many of my others, I really appreciate you joining for this vulnerable conversation and one that I think is really important. If this episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear your thoughts. Have you ever recognized internalized ableism in your own life? How has your understanding of disability evolved over time? And what does collective liberation mean to you? Before I go, I have a quick announcement. I'm excited to share that tickets will be going on sale this Wednesday for Part one. Of my new two part workshop series, Breaking Biblical Barriers. This series is designed for people who want to explore disability, LGBTQ inclusion and justice through a faith lens while challenging some of the harmful narratives that have too often shaped our communities and congregations. If you want all the details, make sure you're signed up for Mandy mail by 5pm Eastern Standard Time tomorrow, Monday, June 15. Subscribers will receive information about the workshop, registration details and other updates from me. As always, thank you for being part of this community and for continuing to engage in these conversations with openness, honesty and a commitment to growth. Until next time, remember, disability, liberation, love are always beyond beautiful.
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